9 – I’m sorry but your account has been deactivated, please see your manager.

8 – How did you do that?

7 – I’ll be out for the rest of the week

6 – we found another zombie on the network and it’s IP matches your computer

5 – the core router is dead and we can’t it replaced until tomorrow

4 – we are performing an emergency maintenance, your email will be back in a few hours

3 – oops, I didn’t mean to press that button

2 – your email to your girlfriend got caught in the spam filter but don’t worry, I unblocked her for you *giggles*

1 – we lost all of your data

10. You like or wear ‘garden shoes’ or ‘sloggers’ because you think they are in style for any reason.

Face it, these things are HIDEOUS!

9. You think anything that you can plug into a USB port is ‘cool’

Example A- USB Ferris Wheel

Example B – USB Owl

Example C – USB Pop-Up Pirate Hub

8. You use any version of Windows Vista

You LIKE and use any version of Windows Vista

7. You are too stupid to realize the new music genre label hard core is nothing more than a mockery and a way of categorizing really crappy & washed out music

6. You think that global warming isn’t a real problem but a conspiracy thought up by ‘liberals’ to keep you from enjoying your gas guzzling SUV

5. You think your vote actually counts in corporate fascist America

4. You think that either 2008 presidential candidate is actually going to ‘lower taxes’ or stop the ‘war against terror’

3. You don’t know how the voting system actually works, yet you still vote

2. You ONLY take webcam photos or angled ‘myspace’ photos yet don’t understand why no one can stand to be around you for longer than 10 minutes and you label yourself ‘hardcore’ or a ‘scene kid’

1. You’re 30+ years old, you enjoy and let your kids watch Disney movies and you believe that fairytales really do come true!